He was mine first
by VegaKeep
Summary: After talking with Trina, Tori thinks back to the one who slipped through her fingers.


Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my ideas

It's nearly ten in the morning when my pear phone starts ringing, and at first I think to myself that if it's That Important, they'll just leave a message. But it's only when I hear Lady Gaga singing 'Bad Romance' as my ringtone do I realize that it's my sister. Without thinking I pick up the phone, hoping that maybe today is the day I start being happy.

"Hello?" I say, as nonchalant as I can be.

"Hey Tori. How have you been?"

I want to say 'How do you think I've been you worthless slut' but instead, more politely I tell her "I've been better."

"Oh? What happened Tori? You don't sound okay" I hear my older sister ask me, genuine concern in her voice. I still can't believe how she's changed from how she was back in Hollywood Arts. The old Trina would never have cared about what was happening in my life, let alone anyone else's.

"Well, to start I caught Michael cheating on me last night" I told my sister, more pissed than upset because when I think about it, he was exactly like K-Fed.

"Tori, I'm sorry to hear that" Trina says, being the sympathetic older sister I always wanted...but now despise.

"It gets worse" I tell her. "When I caught him, he of course tried to deny it but how dumb does he think I am to believe that the whore he had giving him a lap dance was really his personal trainer? I mean, what kind of a 'personal trainer' accepts a bunch of dollar bills being shoved down her underwear?"

"Oh Tori. I'm so sorry. Maybe I shouldn't ask for your help at a time like this, but hey if you need me, I'm here for you little sis" my slut of a sister says to me.

"It's okay Trina. So what can I do to help you?" I tell her, adding inside my head 'seeing that you've already helped yourself to my happiness as well as MY Man.'

"Well, Friday's our wedding anniversary and I was wondering if you wouldn't mind looking after the twins seeing how much they love you and you love to spoil them" Trina tells me.

She sure knows how to kick me when I'm down, even if it is unintentional. But I do love the little darlings and maybe spending time with them will cheer me up, especially if they tell Trina that I took them to Disneyland and they got to go to the front of the line…hmm this may not be so bad after all. All it'll cost me is the entry fee, and a few autographs.

"Of course I'll watch my niece and nephew" I tell my sister.

"Thank you Tori. You're the best" Trina tells me before hanging up. "Of course I'm the best you happiness stealing zorra" I mutter to myself before I turn around towards my dresser, wondering what I'm going to wear today. Being a rising pop-star has its benefits like money to buy the clothes and shoes I want but it also has its drawbacks like paparazzi and ET's Fashion Fascists.

While deciding what I'm going to wear, my eyes then drift to the various photos on my dresser, of me and my friends at Hollywood Arts, bringing with them a flood of memories of those days. It is then that my eyes then wander to a photo of the Shapiro's...and I can feel the tears about to begin.

It's just not fair.

I have everything, and yet I have nothing. True I have the looks, hit songs, bestselling albums, fame, money, a big house, my own line of perfume among other things but what is all of that without happiness and love? I would give everything to switch places with my sister. I just can't help but wonder why it couldn't it be the way it should have been. A smile crossed my face when I replaced Trina's face in the photo with mine and the twins looked like me and not her.

Sure I have a legion of guys drooling and fantasizing about me but what's the point of that when the one man I want is unavailable? Especially when he loved me first.

Then anger begins to well in me as I remember once again that the man I realized that I love, too late, is married to my sister…and it's all fault. I lay back down on my bed, angry with myself.

And then tears start to run from my eyes.

How could I have been so stupid, to throw away a perfectly good man who should be married to me?

Of course, seeing that I was in High School, who can blame me for being immature? I think it started when I told Robbie that Ryder (now there's another K-Fed type of guy. A charmer, but take that away and what are you left with?) was coming over to my parent's house so we could work on the project together, and Robbie asked if he could watch so he could learn on how to get a girl.

I of course told him no, and he said that I wouldn't notice him. When I pressed him on that he revealed to me how he watched me from behind the bushes of my parent's house. Yeah, in a way it is creepy but as I think about it, it's not like he was being a pervert in trying to see me naked or in my undergarments. To be honest I really can't fault Robbie for wanting to do that, seeing how lonely he felt, and what he felt for me.

Rather, he was more like a Romeo, wanting to see his Juliet. An awkward, nerdy Romeo but a Romeo nonetheless because who else but a guy in love would agree to let himself be beat up by that girl's sister? Or help the girl he cares for with her stage lighting test that she beats his record? Or scares up a portable battery for that girl in question's dying pear phone? And he does this asking for nothing in return.

He's everything I want in a man. He is devoted, loving, caring, romantic, attractive, funny, trusting, a great dad and most important, faithful. Robbie has never cheated on Trina, and more importantly he goes out of his way to make her happy by giving her flowers, cards, and simple gifts…things that my past boyfriends have never done for me. The only thing I hate about him is that he is married to my sister instead of me.

Like a fool I wanted nothing to do with him, even after he fixed himself up to look as hot as Ryder did. And it was my foolish pride and want for popularity that blinded me to the idea of Robbie being my date for the Prome.

But I think I was a bigger fool after following what happened with Sinjin's 'Queries For Couples' show, all because my ideal boyfriend was a Ryder Daniel clone minus the using girls for good grades. I just wasn't comfortable with the idea of dating a nerd, let alone have one as my boyfriend.

I did what I could to make him see reality of there never being a chance of us, but despite my adamant refusal in dating him, he still didn't give up. Remembering how he was with Trina following the 'stage kiss' I realized that Robbie was more determined on having a relations me than Trina because of Sinjin's stupid show.

And that's when I made my biggest mistake.

I asked Jade for help, instead of swallowing my pride and giving Robbie a chance.

Why Jade? Because she's mean (and devious) and our relationship has gotten better following the Astronaut play.

So after talking to Jade, she had no problem offering me help. However, she did want for me in return to help her get Beck back, to which I agreed.

Her plan for getting Robbie to leave me alone was ingenious. It was well known that my sister was doing what she could to get Beck to be her boyfriend to become very popular, and unable to accept reality, Trina insisted that it was only a matter of time before Beck became her boyfriend.

The plan called for me to throw my hat into the ring for Beck, which would then infuriate Trina enough that during our arguing, the two of us would make a scene and Jade would conveniently be around to overhear us and conclude that the best way to resolve this would be to bet with each other and see which of us could get Beck to kiss us first.

The winner would be the one who would get to try and date Beck without interference from the loser. The loser on the other hand would have to go on a date with someone of Jade's choosing, and on that date the girl in question has to be on their best behavior and not do things like sabotage the date and at the end of the night, give their date a kiss on the lips regardless of how it turned out.

Of course, the bet would be fixed in that Beck would be in on what we were doing and seeing that Beck was not interested in Trina in any way, he was more than glad to go along Jade's plan. Of course he had no idea about the part where I help Jade get him back, but that was on a need to know basis and Beck certainly did not need to know that. Also, to ensure that my sister did not get suspicious about what we were planning, we agreed that the bet would go on for a little over a week, and that in the end Beck would kiss me.

It was that simple. Beck kisses me, Trina loses and has to go on a date with Robbie where she has to kiss him, Robbie starts stalking Trina again instead of me, I get Beck and Jade to date again, and everyone is happy…except for Trina that is.

Too bad that's not what happened in the end, because it was the furthest from the truth.

Instead, what really happened was that during that stressful week Trina and I had our 'get Beck' competition in which I would flirt with Beck, and Trina would do what she could to sabotage me. Or instead Trina would aggressively try to kiss Beck believing he could not resist her 'irresistible looks,' but she failed. With each failure my sister would continually get worse in her attempts to woo Beck until it finally got to the point that Beck couldn't take it anymore and finally ended the competition by kissing me.

When he kissed me, Trina stood by me with disbelief and then with disgust and horror as a smirking Jade 'revealed' to me and my sister that the 'date' she chose for the loser of the bet was Robbie Shapiro.

To say that my sister was not happy would be an understatement, but that was the case. When we got home, she was ranting about having to date Robbie, and she was adamant in claiming that she would never go on a date with Robbie Shapiro.

Wanting to ensure that Robbie would stalk Trina, I did what I could to convince Trina to honor her obligation by telling her that by not wanting to go with Robbie, she would be playing into Jade's plan because without a doubt she would use the knowledge of her flaking on a bet against her for whatever sick thing she had in mind. Plus I added, Jade was hoping Trina would behave as she said she would to prove that she couldn't handle a nerd like Robbie.

The look in Trina's eyes showed that I had struck a nerve in my sister, that I felt without a doubt that Trina would be a considerate date with Robbie. And then I hammered the final nail into the coffin by talking to Robbie and encouraging him to leave behind that stupid puppet and be the person he normally would be without Rex around on his date.

Why the fuck did I do that? Why did I give Robbie advice for his date? Because I felt sorry for him, and I wanted him to have a good time with a behaved Trina to see that he didn't need to hide behind Rex and to have one happy date in his life.

It's not my fault that Robbie would make the date with my sister a night to remember just like it's not my fault Beck started dating Cat instead of reconciling with Jade. And it is definitely not my fault that Beck married Cat!

How was I supposed to know that after their date Trina was open to the idea of dating him? No one ever told me that nerds are very romantic when given the chance, and Robbie not only made Trina happy, but he melted my sister's heart to the point that she started to act like her head was in the clouds and she fell for him so hard that she's like Jade when it comes to my man.

And with her love and devotion to him, he reciprocated that to her and made her feel like his queen.

It's not fair. He was mine first. But I gave him up, because I was too blind to see what I had in him. It's too bad it took seeing him in the arms of my own sister to realize what I had lost.

I want him.

But he'll never be mine…because he is hers.

Author's Note: This is a companion piece to my 'Return to Cupcake Street' story. I hope you enjoy it enough to review.


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